i used to know you and him
until the alzheimer's hit.
you made him forget
me as his grandson
and see his son as
a friendly stranger visiting
the nursing home filled with
passive zombies, void
of the love you promised.
the possibility of you and
his disease coexisting, let alone
the rest of the world's suffereing
was illogical and insulting to
anything good. and i was
supposed to praise you, the thief
of seventy one years of memory?
believers of you go to heaven to live in
peace. those who don't are fucked.
this is essentially what i was taught
in twelve years of catholic schooling.
my grandpa believed in you and your
son, going to your house every sunday.
he loved our family dearly and was a good
honest man. from these criteria he should
have been on his way to heaven.
the problem is that he forgot who i was.
he forgot that he had been married
and who his children were.
who is to say that he remembered,
much less, believed in you?
throughout his last year he lost almost
all of his memory. by the end there weren't
any signs to show even a hint.
a belief in god most likely escaped him.
by what i was taught, by these criteria,
my grandpa was fucked.
goodbye god.
i forgot you.
sincerely,
michael schenk
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